Hat-trick Muriqi melts Iceland

Scoring a hat-trick in a game is something only a select few have achieved and it’s something footballers dream of. Muriqi scored only his second hat-trick in 10 years in an official match which helped his small country qualify for the B tier of the Nations League.

Our international call-up players all returned from various parts of the footballing globe, the last being Colombian Johan Mojica who played against Paraguay in the early hours of Wednesday morning.
After a short break, the Mallorca squad are preparing for their away game at Valencia on Sunday at 6.30pm. They’ve had a torrid season down at the wrong end of the table. However, the appointment of ex West Brom manager Carlos Corberan has turned their fortunes around and they now sit just above the relegation zone. It would be a huge loss for La Liga if a club with the stature of Valencia were to be relegated.

Starting with Sunday’s game, it’s a turning point in the fortunes of RCD Mallorca. It’s time for the final 10 games in a campaign where once again we’ve punched above our weight and lie in seventh with 40 points. That more or less gives us another season in top flight Spanish football for a record fifth time in a row.

After a severe wobble earlier in the year, we’ve gone six games unbeaten and now comes the difficult part. If we have any hope of fulfilling our European competition ambitions, our four remaining home games against Celta Vigo, Leganes, Valladolid and Getafe are in the must-win category.

Real Mallorca “B” team

As expected, Real Mallorca “B” team were mathematically relegated to the third division of the Spanish Football Federation (RFEF) last Sunday after losing 3-1 at Sant Andreu in Barcelona. Our reserves will now compete in the fifth tier of Spanish football with six matches of their season still to play. Last Sunday the team finished bottom of five groups and became the first side to know their fate for next season, playing on mostly synthetic pitches in the towns and villages of the Balearic Islands.

How on earth are our first team fighting to qualify for a place in Europe while the reserve team is set to languish in a pub league? Ex Mallorca legend Gustavo Siviero has done his best with what talent he had to work with in Son Bibiloni but there’s no doubt the “B” team have been sorely neglected. At no point this season have they looked even likely to produce any kind of form. The team stats are dreadful, 12 points from 28 games, scoring just 17 goals and conceding 48. I’ve no doubt our “B” team will win their league next season and come back up again – but for how long?

There was a real hullabaloo the other day when news broke that our wing-back Pablo Maffeo was to be the first “active” player to turn out in something called Kings League. It’s a seven-a-side indoor football league created in 2022 by former Barça player Gerard Pique in collaboration with internet personalities and streamers. Its aim is to offer a dynamic and entertaining version of traditional football. It’s played primarily in Barcelona and is characterised by innovative rules such as shoot-outs (penalties on the move), unlimited substitutions and the use of “secret weapons” (strategic advantages that teams can activate during the match). I watched a bit of the game on YouTube and the whole caboodle looked like a show for “knuckle-draggers” and Maffeo barely took part. Local fans weren’t well pleased that with Mallorca delicately positioned in a potential European place and with 10 games to go, he could get injured and miss our run-in. They need not have bothered getting aerated. William Shakespeare wrote a play called “Much ado about nothing” and this summed up Maffeo’s cameo appearance. He played four minutes with no opposition player allowed to touch him in any way, shape or form. According to the BBC website, Kings League is about to hit the UK with Rio Ferdinand getting teams together.

AND FINALLY, a doctor in Philadephia made it his regular habit to stop off in his favourite café for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home. The owner knew of his habit and would always have the drink waiting at precisely 17:03. One afternoon the café owner was dismayed that he’d run out of hazelnut extract. Thinking quickly, he threw together a daiquiri made with hickory nuts and set it on the bar. The doctor came in at his regular time, took one sip and exclaimed “This isn’t a hazelnut daiquiri!” “No, I’m sorry,” explained the café owner. “It’s a hickory daiquiri, Doc!!”